


Forsaken House

by monkiainen



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Childhood Memories, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Loss of Parent(s), Parent-Child Relationship, Snow, Snow Angels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-15
Updated: 2015-04-15
Packaged: 2018-03-23 02:23:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3750907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monkiainen/pseuds/monkiainen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Luna takes a trip to see her childhood home in ruins.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forsaken House

**Author's Note:**

> For the prompt _Let it snow_ at [ hh_sugarquill](http://hh-sugarquill.livejournal.com).

It was the early days of December, and yet it felt like autumn all over. The weather was downright dreadful, with constant rain and dull skies. Somehow it fit her mood perfectly, even though Luna wasn’t usually the one riddled with melancholy. However, standing next to a pile of rubble that used to be her childhood home and had so many memories attached to it was disheartening. She had heard the whole story from Hermione afterwards, and while she understood her father’s need to protect her, it still left a bitter taste to her mouth. Was it really worth it, to have their beloved house collapse because of a badly aimed Stunning Spell? Luna isn’t so sure about it.

Her mother’s garden, with Snargaluffs and Gurdyroots and Dirigible plums, was buried deep under the remains of their house. Luna had taken upon herself to take care of the garden after her mother’s death, to honour her memory and to remember her better. She had her own garden back at home, but it wasn’t the same. It didn’t have her mother’s spirit in it, no matter how hard she tried. Rolf hadn’t understood when Luna had tried to explain it to him. He was more interested in searching the Crumple-Horned Snorkack from Sweden than feeling empathy for Luna’s sadness.

Her bedroom, with all her paintings from her friends, was also gone. Luna stifles a sob, for she spent countless hours creating those precious images from the people she felt the closest to. They were the only ones who didn’t judge her for being so _different_ from everyone else – they accepted her the way she is. Sometimes Luna wonders if she had been better off in Gryffindor instead. Still, in her heart she knows Ravenclaw was the best place for her, even if her fellow students weren’t always so nice towards her.

What hurts Luna the most, though, is not the fact that her mother’s garden or her room were destroyed. No. What hurts the most is that her mother’s diaries and various mementoes were destroyed as well, and they can never be replaced. Luna knows one of those diaries contained the spell that killed her mother – how she wishes she had looked it up and showed it to Hermione, who would have known in an instant what was wrong with it. Maybe they could have made it better together, because Hermione is by far the smartest of her friends. 

It doesn’t matter now. The diaries are gone, and so are the few precious photos she had of her mother. There are days when Luna can’t quite remember how her mother looked like. Luna likes to imagine she has inherited her looks from her mother, and spends hours in front of the mirror imagining it’s her mother she’s looking at instead of her own face. Luna remembers the faint smell of gurdyroot because her mother always wanted to ward off Gulping Plimpies when she was working – she said they could be lethal if they made her to lose concentration. Luna wonders if her mother forgot to use gurdyroot the day she died.

Luna knows coming here does not change anything. Her childhood home is gone, her father currently lives in the Bermuda Triangle to study the monster attacking the ships, and she doesn’t think she can repair the damages on her own. Luna knows she can always ask Harry and Ron and Ginny and Hermione for help, but they all have their own lives now. They have better things to do than to help Luna with some old ruins.

Luna startles when she feels a kick in her abdomen. She smiles gently to herself, placing her hands to her rounded stomach. The babies are awake and kicking, sensing their mother’s distress. Luna wishes her mother were still here, to cuddle and spoil her grandchildren. She would have been a lot of help, for Luna has so many questions about childbirth and taking care of newborn babies. Her father means well, but he isn’t exactly the ideal parent to begin with. Luna does not blame him, because a part of his father’s soul and heart died along her mother. He tried his best with Luna, he really did, but Luna does not want to make the same mistakes. She will be present all the time.

The babies are kicking again, and suddenly Luna realizes she has spent here longer than she anticipated. She was just supposed to Apparate quickly in, to see all the damage before it’s all covered with ivy and grass and whatnot. Instead, Luna has spent there several hours, mourning for everything she has lost in her life. Some doors need to be closed before new ones can be opened.

Just as Luna is about Disapparate back to New Zealand, something wet drops to her face. At first Luna thinks they are the tears of a Kelpie, but then she realizes it’s snowing. Big, white snowflakes are slowly making their way to the ground, covering the barren remains of her old home with a soft glow. Luna laughs, spinning around aimlessly. She can’t remember the last time it snowed, and it feels so precious, so wonderful.

Luna waddles to the top of the hill, trying to catch the snowflakes with her tongue. Her father taught her it was good for your lungs, because snowflakes are compressed air and more oxygen-rich than the air they are breathing. It will be good for the babies.

Once she has reached the top, Luna places herself lying in the ground. She has the sudden urge to make some snow angels now that she has the chance. She might not get up again, for her belly is starting to get in the way, but Luna does not care. Rolf can scold her all he wants for ruining her clothes and lying on the dirty ground, but this is what she wants. To feel free and as one with the universe. Luna swears she can almost see her mother’s face in the silent snowfall. Maybe she does, maybe she doesn’t. What Luna knows she doesn’t feel so melancholic anymore.


End file.
